The other night, while forcing my mother to take the quizzes on Pottermore, I had a thought about patronuses that made me laugh--one of those thoughts that no one else probably thinks is funny (this happens a lot). Corporeal patronuses are always these majestic, meaningful, powerful animals (unless you get a salmon) that chase after dementors and save the day, but what if they were just random, ordinary, every-day inanimate objects driving off the horror-inducing personifications of fear and darkness? I found the idea so amusing that I decided to doodle out what would be some of my favorites, if this were how it really worked. Just picture these things going after a horde of swooping, face-sucking dementors and tell me you're not chuckling just a little.
A bowling ball.
A hanger.
Scissors.
A tissue box.
A stick.
A sock.
A chair.
A thumbtack.
A waffle iron.
Wouldn't it have been much more tragically romantic (not sure I really mean that word in this situation, but I digress) if Snape and Lily's patronuses had both been waffle irons? DISCUSS.
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